Here come the power hungry retartded watchies!!!!!!!

You see the annoying thing about giving people with low self esteem positions of power is they automatically abuse it.
For example, at the office since My pal and i set foot through the door, the guards had it in for us. This is not paranoia. You say hi to them, they ignore you, then the next thing, we were constantly being searched. It was meant to be random searching, but that never happened, for us it was clockwork, checked going in and stepping out. Then we spoke the security manager, who then made it clear to them being rude and harassing people shouldn't be the role they play, people actually come to work, not to be harrased. The thick people that they are,instead of randomly checking us, even when we present our wares end up snobbing us in protest. After months of that, today they have arisen!!!I'm hungry and cold having a nice hot cup of tea and queen cakes and one retarded talking guard walks up to my desk, and just starts "you refused to be searched and now you are eating, i will report you." I just looked at her as she spoke and walked away. What should i say, a round of applause to the confident and courageous guard,who faced the forces of evil to save, to save, to save.....? to save what? This is just ridiculous, security guards need to have a certain level of intelligence. The primitive lot need to go through a degree course or form of concetration camp to get their conduct right.I hate abrasive behaviour that has no grounds.
Irritating me in the morning, it just get's to me that i can't just get to work, work and leave without being harassed by some shallow minded twat!!!
Have a watchman free day won't you!

Fresh and ready to go

It was a restful weekend, was definitley worth it! I slept through most of Saturday, woke up at some point and eased into a book, snacked and listened to the very best of Eric Wainaina and Atemi. Amazing music, you need to get your own copy of Atemi's "Hatimaye" and Eric's "Sawa Sawa" and "Twende Twende" albums.
Sunday was pretty great, traumatic; had to be up by 6.30 in the am. It was the first day as a member of the MDT Media team. It was pretty cool, didn't really do much but Joseph walked me through it. The weekend's high light was meeting Nate of Fourth Line Films. He's pretty cool.We spent the better part of Sunday afternoon with Nate for a session on doc-u's. It was cool, hanging out with the team discussing, debating, sharing, critiquing and finally creating mini doc-u's in a matter of minutes and understanding the story telling element in film production. That realisation took me to another level yesterday. I began to re-evaluate myself, my priorities in life, the here and now; where i want to go, where i need to be and how i need to get there.
Let's say it was a weekend that lived up to it's name, God spoke to me in it!!!
Let's kick start the week with the fury it deserves!!!!

Here we are again!

This is the second day, technically the third day of the second last week of April. We are growing older and we need to be more inspired and self motivated. A very cliche start to the day, but I guess it needs to be said. This past weekend was literally revolved around movies saying one thing, Live your life to the fullest and bring out the best that you can really be....or just die in misery, self pity and regret. "The bucket list" A well written and perfectly cast movie. Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson brought the message out loud and clear. I have to admit that my reading hit a go slow at the beginning of the year, but the first book that i kick started the year with was worth the while. " The Pilgrimage" By Paul Coehlo a must read. It's the tale of the secrets to fightig the good fight called life, understanding how you can learn from the challenges that come into your life and the power of facing your fears head on for the bigger victory in the fight we call life!

I can't omit the fact that spirituality has also played a key role in changing my outlook on life. The power of depending on God has proved to be a relief and an experience in itself. I am scared, but not alone and with a single prayer things tend to turn out ok! Live this week with inspiration and purpose, cause that's how we are meant to live everyday anyway!

Godspeed in your good fight!

What's with the Sleep?

So it's the 7th week of the year, chic has plans, chic has no psyche. I'm just tired and i constantly want to sleep. Then i get a phone call from an enthusiastic friend this morning who believes in me not to fail, not to back down. to keep going. I would love to all this but I've just lost the willpower to do it. I am so lazy and so tired i want to cry. I joined a gym, but alas i still have no enthusiasm, i feel dead. I really believe i need to go to church this Sunday or i am done for, for another week. I believe it is spiritual fatigue. Lord help me today , i have a brain storming meeting, not like my brain has been working at all.

I am tired even typing this...need to go and get some spiritual juice, i am spiritually void!

Write-a-thon 2008

So here I am dandy and good to go. Have fumbled around and now i have opted to take the plunge and wake up earlty be at work and use the comp while i am raising enough cash to buy a computer to use at home. I have entered myself into essay competitions i pray to God i'll complete. Then there is a movie script for a short film that i am meant to be working on. Insanity and burn out are about to hit me but need to keep at it and find ways of rejuvenating myself.
so here we are again! I have nothnig deep and prfound to say and all i can think of is how can i revamp this blog to make it more than just my online diary. Probabalya scrap book or an activists site in the making, i have no clue.
Eureka.................the need for urbanisation is here. the launch of an idea and a campaign.............re-build Kenya.Not quite enthusiatic and get up and go, but ia m working on it i am. Trying to start somewhere. Heck even Koffi Annan started somewhere.

Fresher than Fresh!!

It is a new week, the last week of the 2nd last month of the year! I feel great , i feel released. Released from their bondage of frustration and uncertainty! Prayed this weekend and rested, finished a book, getting started on another one. As always, reading "Condi: The Condolezza Rice Story" was inspiring and provocative. Made me realise, rather reaffirm that true success comes with sacrifice. That isn't anything new, but there's one element that i always over look. I love my sleep more than i love utilising the early hours of the day that the Good Lord gave me to do what i need to do to improve myself!
There's something that caught my ear yesterday evening when i was watching "Judging Amy", Vincent, the guy acting as Amy's brother the writer was in a correctional facility trying to get some talented writing prisoners to keep at what they do best! They expressed frustration in keeping at writing, when they knew very well that no one was going to read their work! He said something really smart....he said, "write for yourselves." I know it doesn't sound like much, but that statement meant alot to me! Here I am a writer by profession, but i have completely lost inspiration, what people would refer to as suffering from writers block! i try my best to keep at it, but at times i have no clue as to why i should even bother! The truth is, however discouraged or how bleak things may seem, it is important to keep at what we do best, even though we haven't really experienced the life transforming breakthrough in our lives!
That's why i know for the time to come, i will continue to use this blog as my notebook to the world! It may be the normal rants and raves of any other person. But the passion that exudes from me with every word i type, is my expression, is my contribution to the world of opinion and thought! I just believe that this is my answer to being! Being who i am, who I was and are yet to be and see!
It is a new day, the end of a month....the power is in the word that i print today, not necessarily to you, but it is to me!
The pleasure in having this site, is the comfort and fulfillment that it accords to me, without prejudice or favour!

I am in love with what i do, for the first time, i can genuinely say this, without a flinch or doubt in my heart or mind!

Am I making a big mistake?

The past couple of days have been a tussle! A tussle of sleep and excessive sleep, laziness, lack of self motivation and will! lack of purpose and a constant query.....why in the world am I here! It has nothing to do with finances at this point, it is the emotional crap and weird relationships that i am falling in to! It is so freaking messed up!
After what i have experienced this week, relationships of any kind seem to be repelling, literally re-igniting my initial fear of commitment and a strong disinterest in any form of committed relationship! It has sparked a burning immediacy for me to fight for myself, stand my ground, and fight for me, my progression in career and academia. I need to go back to school, i want to go back to school, and i need to care for what is important for me, fulfill my destiny, reach out to my dreams!
i have also realised and come to appreciate the significance of faith in my life, the purpose of human inadequacies to bring out the necessity of God, the supreme, spiritual being in our lives, who curves our lives in the direction that they are meant to be!
I am happy single, i have clearer mind to see what is urgent and what is important in my life! I am scared, scarred and cold! But one thing that i do know is that I need to choose what's best for me regardless of how scary it is! I know my thoughts are incoherent right now, but my spirit is right on track with where I am headed and where to be!
The time is now to listen to the Almighty and follow his lead................now i understand why they call it a LEAP of faith! cause right now i need a Ben Johnson leap to start this phase of my life!